“If you are bored in a conversation, you are the boring one”

I used to think the quality of communication comes from speaking well. Now I realized that it is only partly true. Real communication deeply depends on listening.

What I see from all my private courses and consultancy sessions is that people lack good listeners in their lives. 

People tend to formulate their answers while someone is talking to them. Each conversation is an opportunity to grow but not a challenge that one side should win. Everyone has enough time and brainpower to formulate an answer after the conclusion of the other side’s speech.

Sit, stand, whatever you do, just focus and listen. People tend to open up when they feel that someone is really caring about what they think. You do not need to formulate your answer. Just listen. Things will be much more interesting. No one needs to “win” a conversation. Winning a conversation is such a subjective concept. Everyone can win an argument based on their own terms. It is not important.

I, couple of years ago, heard an interesting quote, mentioning “If you are bored in a conversation, you are the boring one”.

I am not saying I agree or disagree with this statement.

But I believe that it is worth thinking about.